WAKE UP AND SMELL THE ROSES: WEEK 5
Here for the right reasons.
HUMORENTERTAINMENT
Ryan Leatham
2/14/20243 min read
Joey is alright with a slow burn (Rachel).
Part 2 of Week 4 actually began with a rose ceremony. We lost Sydney on Monday night, and Allison and Edwina followed after not receiving a rose Tuesday.
With that, a slightly smaller crowd was on its way to Andalusia, Spain. Joey rode in on a Vespa Lizzie McGuire style and scooped up Kelsey A for a day on the town. They played soccer and visited a magic fountain on their way to a scenic picnic. At dinner, she told Joey the story of her mom passing away from breast cancer and how important she was and is to her. Joey appreciated Kelsey A sharing this with him and gave her a rose.
The group daters were Daisy, Lexi, Jenn, Maria, Katelyn, Kelsey T, Autumn, Lea and Madina. The mission was to write their feelings down for Joey in one sentence and then create a painting out of it. Jess was the winner with “Our future is as bright as the diamond I hope to receive because our love is something I truly believe”. The bar was in hell. She got some bonus body paint time with Joey leading Maria to say it was, “the first time in her life she was jealous of Jess”. What a treasure.
That evening Maria shared the story of a terrible car accident with her mother when she was young. A cement truck fell on them, she was pronounced dead on the scene and somehow survived. This came out of nowhere and hit like…a truck. Joey gave Maria the group date rose for her openness.
Rachel and Joey enjoyed the next one-on-one. It was Rachel’s dream date. They went Flamenco dancing and even performed in front of a crowd. Rachel was smooth, Joey was less so, but at least looked the part. Handsome guy! At dinner Joey told Rachel how much he enjoys conversation with her, and that they seem to have an organic chemistry. Rachel shared how important her career as a nurse is to her and Joey liked that about her. The degree of difficulty on this date was high and Rachel rose to the occasion.
At the cocktail party, it was Jess who cracked under the hot, hot Maria sun. This is an admittedly and overtly pro-Maria content channel, but this may have been her first misstep stealing Joey away when she already had a group date rose. Jess played with the bull and got the horns when she challenged Maria on this, unsuccessfully. Her worst fears were avoided however when she received a rose. Madina and Autumn were left out in the cold. Sorry, ladies.
Rose Recap
This was a tricky week for the Rose Recap because we got two rose ceremonies for the price of one list. What we will do is grade the first ceremony for accuracy as normal, then remove the girls that were roseless, and grade that for the second ceremony. How’d we do? Pretty damn good. At the first rose ceremony we correctly predicted 12 out of the 13 roses given. Of the three that went home we had correctly predicted Sydney and Edwina to be in that group, we were incorrect on Allison going home, having had Madina in the bottom three.
That left the new bottom of the list to be Madina and Autumn, who both went home at the second ceremony. Clear as mud, right? Simply put, we correctly predicted all 10 of the 10 roses given at this ceremony.
Season Accuracy: 94.7% 🔮 (36/38)
Rose Rankings
Daisy
Lexi
Rachel 📈
Kelsey A
Kelsey T
Maria 📉
Jenn
Jess
Lea
Katelyn
If You’re Reading This It’s Too Late
The top ten is set, and we have an announcement to make. What we didn’t mention that also happened at the cocktail party was Daisy sealing the deal by checking in with Joey and asking how he was feeling. Classic winners move. You’ll also notice that she is never involved in the drama whatsoever. Yeah, it’s over y’all. She’s played this perfectly so far, and honestly her lead is insurmountable. You can officially stop reading this the rest of the season! If you do decide to stick around for more spoiler-free Bachelor content, cheers and thanks for being here for the right reasons.
Daisy is going to win.
